Sometimes I have moments where I think I’m smarter than I actually am.

I mean, by general standards, I’d probably rate myself somewhere in the “average to above average” intelligence range.  My Hubs is definitely above average on that same smartness scale.  He’s definitely smarter than I am.  He uses words that I have to look up…not to try to seem more clever than he is…but just because he actually knows them and those words are more accurate descriptions of what he’s trying to say.

Once he used the word “desiccated” and I thought he meant “desecrated”… so I made fun of him for misusing the word because I was SO SURE that he was wrong.  I even made a bet over it….which I lost as soon as I consulted my good friend dictionary.com on the issue.  My Hubs was talking about the rainfall being low and that our grass was really desiccated….I thought he meant destroyed…what he really meant was “extremely dry.”  Since then, only when I’m positive…I mean, absolutely positively, I-studied-that-word-a-million-times-for-the-SAT-in-high-school positive…do I challenge him on it.  And I’ve been right a few times….a very few times.  I still love those times though…probably because I’m hard-headed and really like to be right.

Tid Bit spent all last week at school looking forward to the Pirate Palooza that was going to be happening this past Friday.  Each class did some fun pirate related crafts, read some fun stories, drew treasure maps…the works.  He’d come home and bury “treasure” in the yard and then pace off where it was to draw on his map.  And Friday…well, Friday was the day where he got to dress like a pirate.  We spent well over an hour on Thursday scouring our house for pirate looking gear to wear.  I cut a cheap white t-shirt of mine and laced it together at the neck with jute string, and even cut zig zags on the bottom hemline to look tattered.  We made wrist cuffs from some scrap leather I happened to have lying around, and I fashioned a vest out of some pieces of fabric I’d used for a craft project a couple of years ago.  We tied a scarf around him as a sash, and slung one of my wide black belts over his shoulder to look like a sword holster.  He looked amazing.

See…..

He’s even been talking like a pirate.

“Ahoy there Mommy!  I feel like I could eat a whale.  Could I please have a snack?”

“ARGHHHH little brother, you’re going to have to walk the plank!”

“Look out matey’s, I’m digging for buried treasure!” (as he makes a giant hole in the yard.)

You get the picture.

So, when he was sitting on our bed coloring a pirate map with the Hubs the other night and said “Look out you land BLUBBER,”  I got really tickled.  But, not nearly as tickled as when my husband corrected him and said “No…it’s Land LUBBER.”

I burst out laughing and said “What did you say?!”

Tid Bit said “It’s land BLUBBER Daddy!”

My hubs looked kinda sheepish and said “No…it’s land LUBBER!”

I kept laughing and said “No…you’re both wrong.  It’s land LOVER.  Like a person who loves the land.”  And then I continued my jesting and ridicule of my husband and son.  Laughing so hard because seriously…who’s ever heard of a “Lubber?!”  That’s not even a word!

Today we had lunch with some friends and the conversation turned somehow to “smarts.”  I said that my Hubs is smarter than I am, but threw in that I feel very satisfied when I have a moment of real cleverness and know something that he doesn’t.  I gave the example from the previous night about the “Land Lubber.”

Our friend Phil burst out laughing and said “It IS Land LUBBER!”  Not Lover…or Blubber!”

Phil is from Australia.  I think probably a large portion of Australia was originally run by pirates…thus the cool accents of both Australians and pirates.  So I was a little bit more willing to believe Phil…but still…I wanted my moment of correctness in the sun to enjoy as well.

My Hubs broke out Google and then I knew I’d be proven correct….FINALLY we’d put an end to this hilarious ridiculousness and use of a word that was about as real as the ones my uncle Pete would make-up to beat me in Scrabble when I was a kid.

Here’s what Google told us:

land·lub·ber/ˈlan(d)ˌləbər/

Noun: A person unfamiliar with the sea or sailing

I insisted that we look up “Land Lover” to prove that in fact was another way to say the word…the correct version of course…of a person who knows and loves the land more than the sea.  And here is what Google had for us then:

land lover

The pirate expression of scorn for those who don’t go to sea is not “land lover” but “landlubber.”

 

DOH!  Say what?!

I hate to be wrong!  Especially when I’m so sure I’m right.

That’s what I get for making fun!

Here’s to hoping that moving forward, my average “smarts” can help me get my foot out of my mouth…and perhaps even keep it out!

Doubtful….